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Sunday, 5 August 2012

Fake News! Zombie diseases are changing the online dating industry...

They use to say it is never too late to date, and now with the emergence of lonely and single undead from cemeteries across the world, the adage has never been more true.  Stretching their cold dead hands across keyboards, zombies have been staggering and moaning in hoards to websites like GetMeAZombieDate.com and DoesMyBottomLookDeadInThis.com.

Melissa, a 22 year old graphic designer from Birmingham, stated zombies are the new vampires.  "Last year it was all vampires, but they quickly got boring as they could only go out at night and were very moody.  

"I even dated one vampire with a purple face, Count Dracula, and he spent all night counting the calories I consumed at dinner.  But zombies are different.  They are much more fun and they really take things slow with the relationship."

Melissa's friend Jody, a 27 year old sales consultant, has not followed the craze.  "I am like one of those ladies who doesn't follow trends, and stuff.  Plus I am really into hygiene, and Melissa's 'zomboyfriend', Dave, is smelly and looks like death warmed up.  And sometimes his limbs just fall off.  That's gross."

Melissa however believes that Dave's sensitivity and sense of humour makes up for these faults that Jody sees in him.  She is just one of many finding love after death do us part.

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